letters to past lovers
winter 2016 | pentax k-1000, kodak ultramax 400 35mm filmThis series explored my desire for intimacy, to be seen and loved despite my jagged edges, and my simultaneous inability to remain remotely close to anyone around me. Closeness with the partition of the camera’s lens. Closeness for concept rather than closeness in authenticity. At the time, I shot only in black and white. I wanted to breathe more life into my subjects, my concept, with the hopes that more life would in turn be breathed into me. Experimenting with color, intimacy, and being present was harder than I thought it would be. I’m grateful that 21 year old me at least tried.
you came like a tempest and swept me away. i could smell the sunlight on your skin
your eyes and your softness, your utter pliability and sensual deference, awakened a pulse, long sleeping
you pulled me down and, for once, felt my heart beating
i kissed you and could taste the force of a thousand galaxies between our lips
our collision was orchestrated by those above. matter and antimatter, hurdling toward an event horizon
you were a beacon of light
i was lost someplace between darkness and desire.
we were a fever dream
so i left you in the morning time.
there was love in the air and i simply couldn’t breathe
