Having clear, discerning psychic + intuitive perception can save your life.

Several weeks ago, my (now) husband and I bought tickets to a Ben Bohmer & Rufus du Sol show at Folsom Field in Boulder. The decision was made on a bit of a whim… We’d never been to a show there before, we were excited for our upcoming wedding and in a celebratory mood. So why not?

We both enjoy Bohmer’s music. I, personally, had listened to very little of Rufus save for this summer, and one singular song: Innerbloom. Between sessions, after work, on my days off I’d go lay in the sun by the pool and listen to that song on repeat. It was so beautiful, a dance of frequency through my ears. Whenever any other Rufus came on, however, I’d typically hit ‘skip’.

When it came time to get ready for the show, I got the nudge to throw up some protection around us. This is something I do pretty regularly- especially when going to shows, big events, anything where I’m going to be around a big crowd of people- so I didn’t think much of it. Sitting in the crowd, surrounded by tons of college students under the influence of a lot of things, I felt a little weird but not generally concerned.

Ben Bohmer opened, not too many paid attention as most were there for Rufus, but I was totally locked in. I dropped in to the absolute depths of my heart. I was able to move so much grief, making way for all the love that I carry in my soul to flood through my body. I felt Spirit in every cell, in every raindrop that fell on my skin, and I saw waves of compassion and light wash over the entire stadium. All I could do was look around with a smile on my lips, light in my eyes, and hope in my heart. Hope for the liberation of all beings, hope for a world that exists within its heart, hope for kindness and joy to take precedent over violence and hate. I was happy. I was at peace. And I was full of so much light and gratitude.

During the time between sets, the energy started to shift. I started to feel antsy, uncomfortable, and trapped. At first, I shrugged it off given I don’t love crowds and was surrounded by a lot of intoxicated people. Then I got a very clear message: “Pay attention and be ready.” Okay.

Rufus was taking their time to begin, so I took my chance to run to the bathroom. As I wove my way through the increasingly chaotic crowd, I looked up to see hundreds more pouring in through security… into a stadium that already felt like it was at capacity. By the time I got back to my husband, I felt very overwhelmed and like something was off. Again, dismissing it due to the fact that I’m deeply introverted. A boy in front of us turned around, offered us two floor tickets. “No, thank you” flew out of my mouth before I even thought it through. The message came again, louder and more firm: “Pay attention and be ready.” I immediately cleared our little protective bubble and reinforced its edges. As soon as Rufus started, I understood why.

It wasn’t seconds into their first song that I went from seeing the show in its physicality, to seeing what was happening energetically. The people on stage were not people, rather reptiles masquerading as such. I turned to my husband and said “Those aren’t people up there…” he shook his head, agreed, and took my hand. As the song continued, I watched as a beast took form, center stage. My spirit immediately flew down to the field, palms up, holding a barrier of light, “No. You cannot do this, you do not have consent.” Tentacles erupted from the beast, pushing me back, back, back. The songs continued, people around me scream-chanting “I’m on my knees again,” the tentacles surging into the crowd and plunging into their hearts. I was back in my body, frozen, screaming on the inside as I witnessed thousands of people allowing one of the darkest creatures I’ve ever seen into their hearts: consent given through the lyrics they were singing along to. I felt strikes like battering rams against the little protective bubble around us. “No, no, no,” I kept repeating in my mind, out loud, every way I could. Bile rose up in my throat, my vision started spotting, I was about to pass out. Suddenly everything went quiet. I couldn’t hear, see, feel anything around me. All I could see was one of my guides in front of me saying: “You have to go, now.” The present moment came rushing back, I grabbed my husband and said “We need to leave, immediately.” He took my hand, and as we looked down the row towards the stairs, all we could see were people. The field was packed shoulder to shoulder. The stadium seats were overfull. The stairways along each section were flooded with people. Slowly, the entire world spinning around me, we wove our way up and out. Down through the chaotic corridor, out through the security gates, scooped the water bottle I wasn’t allowed to bring in (I really need to get better at my ‘show prep’), and a half mile back to our car. By the time I plopped into the passenger seat, I was violently shaking. I just witnessed a world-renowned band stall the beginning of their show in an effort to allow as many souls as physically possible to squeeze into a stadium, in order to systematically break down any resistance or lack of consent- via their setlist- to the most disgusting etheric creature anchoring into their hearts and siphoning their life. What the actual fuck?

On my podcast, I’ve mentioned before how I’ve noticed a vibe difference in listening to certain artist’s music on my own time: at the gym, while I cook, etc… VS seeing them live. I’ve been to plenty of shows, concerts, etc where I see portals, vortexes, cyclones open, siphoning occur, and in some moments I’ve been able to hang, still enjoy the music, just be on my guard. In other moments, I’ve gotten the fuck outta there. Deleted the artist, the song, the album from my saved list. Goodbye. Some artists aren’t aware of the energy attached to them, the energy they’re channeling when creating, performing, etc. (Because, let’s be real: art is channeling. Artists are channels.) Other artists are- and that is when I most certainly leave.

What I witnessed at the Rufus show was on an entirely different level. I knew Rufus du Sol was popular, what I wasn’t aware of was the absolute cult-like following they have. (My husband very kindly explained this to me afterward, because apparently I am a hedge-witch that lives under a rock). The crowd’s response to them coming on stage was as though they were in the presence of gods… and that’s certainly the level of complex they had about themselves. What I saw happen at this show was aggressive, violent, and planned. It felt intentional, their delay starting the show, allowing as many souls to pack in to the space (aka: reaping field). It wasn’t just a portal or vortex or cords of energy moving through the crowd. It was a beast summoned on stage, something sentient, conscious, and cognizant of its purpose: to attach and drain. Just as the ‘musicians’ on stage were sentient, conscious, and cognizant of their purpose: to break, and break, and break down resistance… opening the doors wide for said beast. I personally don’t get too tied up about the hierarchy of negative beings within the Earth and the Universe- reptilians, archons and the like- because, the way I see it, they are all serving the Demiurge. An entity so far removed from true, organic life source energy that it must impose itself on beings, people, worlds in order to feed off them. It is narcissistic, vampiric, and abusive in nature. Rufus’ setlist is a perfect example of how it functions:

At face value, Rufus comes off as something of the light, something beautiful- their name is Rufus du Sol, afterall. You don’t expect to me viciously attacked via frequency, energetically manipulated and stolen from. As soon as their set started, however, it was punishing, relentless. They began by dazzling the crowd with ‘Inhale & Brighter’. Speaking to a light so bright, feeling the sunshine… yet it all felt hard, jagged, and sharp-edged. A mimicry of light. They moved into ‘Lately’, opening the heart, moving into ‘Breathe’, a deep yearning for more. Then they hit the crowd with the hook: 'You Were Right’. Music, frequency, makes us feel things. It affects our bodies: physically, energetically, at a cellular and soul level. Most of us don’t think about what we’re singing and bopping along to. Most certainly don’t think of what we’re tying ourselves to when we chant the lyrics out at a concert. The lead in to the attack was brilliantly planned: in theory, all of these songs are beautiful… about love, some mistakes, human things. Trustworthy. “Hey, I see you, we can relate…” The whole time, though, even if you weren’t viewing it from a psychic/spiritual lens: it looked hard. It looked scary. And then it looked like the depths of hell.

The drop in to the classic narccissitict-abuse move was hard and fast: ‘On My Knees’. I watched as the crowd essentially went slack jawed under the spell, fully opening themselves to all that was being blasted from that stage. That’s when I couldn’t take it anymore. The next day, I looked up the setlist and my suspicions were confirmed: the lure in, the jab of pain, the balm to the wound (ending the set with ‘Innerbloom’.)

Narcissists work in this way: They lure you in, mirror back to you everything you want to hear. They hurt you, and they gaslight you into believing they didn’t hurt you, they make you believe only they have the cure. The cycle repeats, and repeats, and repeats… all the while they are siphoning off your energy, your attention, your love, your life to make themselves taller, stronger, to keep themselves on top and alive. This is the mode of operation of the demiurgic systems that trap people within cycles of suffering. Most people don’t see it. Most people believe the lie, the illusion of light. Most people don’t read between the lines or look beyond the gilded mask: they take it at face value (as we should be able to do). And these systems of abuse and extraction know that. So they fluff themselves up, they pose as the savior when really they’re the ones causing the harm.

You’re probably wondering when I’m going to get to the point of this long-winded story. Well, here we are, at the point:

All of this is why I say that your psychic & intuitive senses can save your life. I am seeing and experiencing what’s going on between the lines, behind the gilded mask, every moment of everyday. Do I see and interpret and understand all of it all at once all of the time? Absolutely not. I am human and I do not know everything. However, I am connect to my soul, which is connected to Spirit (goddess, god, source, the universe… however you personally relate to the pure, organic, all-that-is energy and consciousness of life). Being in flow with Spirit, trusting in my soul, my higher self, my guides, allows me to move through life and discern what is helpful and what is harmful. Being ‘awake’ to what’s really going on, if you will. Before I trusted myself, my senses, my connection to Spirit, I most certainly was corded into at shows, festivals, by people, music, what have you. I unconsciously opened myself to entities, energies, beings that absolutely did not have my best interest at heart- beings that are not connected to Spirit, but rather to the Demiurge. I was in relationships that sucked the life out of me. I suffered through extreme depression and darkness for years. I trusted therapists, healers, teachers and friends that- had I leaned in to my own intuitive knowing- I would have seen through the mask, the illusion, the lie long before they were able to get their claws into me.

Psychic / intuitive perception isn’t only for healing circles. Discernment isn’t only for spiritual topics. All of it for everyone, everywhere. I hate that it’s like that- that you can’t just go to a concert and have a good time. I hate that so many beautiful things in life have been taken over and distorted, used as a tool of infiltration, manipulation, and extraction. It’s the world we live in, though. It’s the world we will continue to live in if we don’t start trusting ourselves, anchoring into what is true and good, and seeing through the screen that’s put up to distract and trick us. The clearer we all begin to see, the more agency we have. When we have that sight, that knowing, and that agency, we then have a choice. Still using Rufus as an example: had 1/8th of the crowd seen what was happening on an energetic + spiritual level, they would have had the opportunity to make an informed decision, rather than have their heart space ripped open and completely infiltrated + siphoned, unaware. Most, I hope, would have refused, would not have fallen under the spell. And thus that beast would have had a much smaller dinner. It would grow smaller in its power. The Demiurge is a machine that needs to be plugged in to a power source to work. We are the power source. We have the power to starve it. You can’t starve something you can’t see, though.